Funniest Lada joke yet!

Reminds me of a funny story, some of those nutters had a habit of rocking up to Lada drivers at traffic lights and hassling them about the fact they were driving a Lada. Mate's mother who was in her mid 70's and would not say boo to a goose was sitting in her Lada at the Lincoln/Morehouse lights with her drivers window wound down on a summers day. This clown came along and stuck his head in the window and started shouting at her. So she wound up the window until she had him by the neck and he could not escape, waited until the lights went green and proceeded to tow him across the intersection at a brisk walking pace. Complicated by the fact he had to run sideways.
Never thought she had it in her. She reckoned he would be more careful next time. Must have looked bloody funny.

LOL, that little anecdote just made my morning. I had to wipe tears of laughter from my eyes! Thanks for sharing.

Ladaswere imported into the U.K. via Hull.They were known to be a good work vehicle. I should ask on a U.K. Board for further info, Yes there was the odd joke but they were a well respected car in the 80s

http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/motoring/6859697/Lada-Classic-production-ends

My nana had a lada back in the day. By golly it was a tank of a car. Don't remember which model it was though.

I used to have a 1600cc something (2104, 2105!) sedan as a student, and for a few years after. It was previously owned by an elderly couple, and hadn't had a lot of maintenance - the air cleaner had mostly been sucked through the engine, which was the least of it's problems.
Build quality was fairly average, but it was about average for rust as a car of the 80's. I do remember the panel steel was very thick, and the doors were heavy. I got rid of it in the end as it was pretty much worn out at 110,000 miles. The buyer did it up a bit, then it disappeared from carjam about 5 years later. RIP I guess.
My main dislike of it was that the car was designed for left-hand drive, and the conversion for NZ wasn't the best. For the NZ car, the engine bay was empty on the left hand side, with only spark plus and HT leads, a few relays, and the steering idler. The other side had every sodding thing else.The steering box, pedal boxes (and vacuum servo), starter motor, alternator, exhaust and inlet manifolds, and the steel heater pipes. I had to replace the steering box, which took me most of the day to extract.
The owner's manual was interesting to read. You could start these cars at something like -20degC. The trick (apparently) was to turn the engine over a few times with the crank handle, before using the electric starter. It gave the battery a chance to get things moving. Oh, and the heater was awesome! And crank handles are awesome for setting the timing, or getting going with a weak battery.

That was probably a Samara. One thing about the Samara and other Euro cars was that the ignition module was on a separate alloy heat sink on the firewall, and so hardly ever failed. Unlike Japanese cars where the ign module is inside the dist on the cyl head, and has to dissipate heat.into a component that is already at 90c.

Actually the trick in the Lada owners manual for a cold start was to turn the headlights on for about 30 seconds, this got the battery going and warmed it up so it would crank the car. This is for temps we'd never see in most of NZ.

Another story about the above Niva.After sitting around the back of the caravan for a couple of years and full of rust, it was time to shift it, so in an effort to get the bonnet open we broke the cable to the release catch, no worry's,we had a pinch bar and rammed it under the front and tried to lever it open. After swinging on the bar for a while nothingmoved, then my smart arse brother who was watching said "i thought those bonnet's were hinged at the front" ---Duh

Ladatrouble, I think the Samara was the more modern wedge shaped one. The elderly couple bought one as a replacement. Mine looked more like a barge :)
Ignition module! Mine was still the old points and coil. The only transistors were in the aftermarket radio. The indicator flashers were thermal; even the handbrake warning light used a thermal flasher. Maybe the Russians were building them to survive nuclear EMPs (ha ha).
The other low temperature advice was to start with the clutch in, so that the thick oil in the gearbox didn't stall the starter. Yep, temperatures we will hopefully never see.
The owner's manual was for a 2103, mine was a couple of models later. The 1600cc I had was the the up-specced one, with extra chrome, separate high and low beam headlights, and what looked like u-beams for front and rear bumpers. Quite solid - it left its mark on a few cars that side swiped it in Dunedin.

Schoolgirl walking down the road.
Older man pulls up and calls through the window "Little girl, little girl, get in my car and I'll give you a sweetie".
"No, no, go away, go away" she cries out running down the road.

He pulls up again and calls out "Little girl, get in my car and I'll give you a handful of sweeties".
"No, no, go away, go away" she cries and runs down the road again.

He pulls over a third time and says "Listen little girl, get in my car and I'll give you a bag of sweeties".
Finally, she turns around and says "Look dad, I've told you before, I'm not getting in the f.ing Lada."