An elderly man was stopped by the police around 2 a.m and was asked where he was going at that time of night.
The man replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."
The officer then asked, "Really! Who's giving that lecture at this time of night!"
mrfxit,
Mar 24, 7:35pm
The man replied,
. . . ."That would be my wife."
. .
bumfacingdown,
Mar 24, 7:41pm
Oldy but still a goody
mrfxit,
Mar 24, 7:44pm
Will always be a goody because it's so very true.
Been there done that, had that sermon waiting for me.
p_rock,
Mar 24, 11:44pm
Haha, good one.
muzzaandmich,
Mar 25, 3:21am
Was pulled over at check point. Officer said Say your name and address please driver So. I. Said say your name and address please driver
Did not go down too well. So he breath tested me I don't drink Sowhat a wasted effort .
haventrader,
Mar 25, 4:49am
I've always wondered what they would do if you inhaled when saying your name and address, rather than exhaled.
the-saint1,
Mar 25, 6:10am
I have said my details through clenched teeth, the cop was not impressed, out came the bag, he told me to blow until he said stop.I blew very very softly but made my cheeks look like I was playing a trumpet, he was getting peed off at this stage.I told him I had asthma and had a lot of trouble breathing and this was making the asthma worse, I also said the stress he was putting me under is having an effect on my damaged heart valve, he gave up in the end and told me to get going.I don't drink either lmfao! Another time I came to a checkpoint with about 10 cars queued up so I did a u-turn and left the scene. Suddenly there was a cop car right behind with lights and sirens going. He asked me why I had departed from the queue and I told him I had just remembered I had left the stove on with the knives on. He stared at me hard, tested me for grog and told me to get home and sort the stove. He was not a happy man. I love having fun with these people, they are so easy to wind up!
scuba,
Mar 25, 6:43am
haha i like to change direction or take a side road when i see a check point.just to see if they follow.they sometimes put a checkpoint about 50 meters from my house and get quite irritated when i do a uturn 20 meters away and pull into a driveway. More than onceone of them quickly walked over to check me out.
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